Everyone is talking about Kurt Warner. He is this knight in shining armor to GM's. The funny thing is I don't know why.
Yes, he was the feel good story of the NFL and the Super Bowl. We all love the underdog; coming from Arena Football and your local grocery store, but we have to let that die.
The fact is Kurt Warner is not worth a lot of money. He not worth much. First off he is 38 years old this fall. That will not help you out, especially with the cap on most teams and a financial crisis hitting pro sports. Secondly he is not an overly successful QB. In all his pro career, he only has 5 winning seasons and only two of them featured more than 10 wins. Even then those years were in a dome and sunny Arizona. Though to counter when he traveled to the East Coast or heaven forbid a cold climate, he falls apart (see New England this year).
The time to act for Kurt Warner was like 7 years ago, when he was worth a damn. Now, I cannot see spending money on him, even if I am Minnesota. The economics and time are just not on his side. Granted he didn't win the big game, he should have walked away from football. Though he will never be a Hall of Famer (those stats are not impressive to the history of the game) he will be remembered in the same light as Rudy or Vince Papale.
Friday, February 27, 2009
Thursday, February 26, 2009
OH NO HE DI'NT!
Interior (Sal's 401K Victor Bureau)
(Seth is typing on his computer, searching the Internet for Joe Namath pictures. He finds this photo and quickly opens up a browser and sends Sal Fasano the pic.)
Seth (With a worried look): Oh no, I hope he doesn't know.
(Pause)
(Phone Rings)
Seth (Picking up receiver): Hello?
Sal (through phone): What the F*CK!?! WHERE DID YOU FIND THIS!?!
Seth: Listen I found it on the Internet -
(Over the phone a huge crash is heard, its the sound of Sal throwing his computer out the window.)
Sal: WHO SAID HE COULD DO THAT!?! That's my 'Stache, nobody wears the FU-MANCHU, unless I, Salfonso Fasano APPROVES!
Seth: Sal, baby, it's not what it seems, he just grew it -
Sal: I DIDN'T APPROVE SH*T!!! I am going to cut that mother a new one! Then I'm going to eat his children!
Seth: Sal, you can't go back to jail again!
(Dial Tone)
Seth (turning to camera): Don't ever grow a Fu-Manchu with out his consent. (Points finger at camera.) GOT IT!
Sal Sez: You never grow it, unless I approve it. F*cking Joe Willie Namath!
Youth Sports Suck!
This morning on The John DiTullio Show, John had a legendary round table with local writers and sports anchors. The point of the visit was to talk about free agent picks for the Buffalo Bills. Somehow the conversation was sidetracked by callers complaining about their kids not getting enough coverage in town.
"Youth sports are not getting represented!"
"No one covers my kids games!"
"How come no one talks about youth hockey in Rochester!"
"GARBLE GARBLE GARBLE!"
Can I get a HAR-UMPH!
WHAM-TV sports anchor Mike Catalana neutralized the blaze of annoying calls by mentioning that local media only have enough time and resources to cover games. In fact due to our lack of top-tier major league team, we have a lot of high school and youth sports coverage.
Then like a wise sports writer he is, Scott Pitoniak laid out the wisdom. He pointed out that the problem lies in the parents. It could not have been spoken any better.
See the parents are the one's pushing for coverage. They push for the exclusives and the footage and the interviews. The athletes are out to play, especially in this market.
Let's be honest in Rochester, New York, there are very few, if any blue chip recruits who know the game of media and are playing it. That happens in LA, New York City or Chicago... not in market listed in the low 80's of over 180 markets.
The Roundtable of Flower City Journalism discussed the impact coaches have on young athletes and the parents damaging those coaches. Both writers of Sal's 401K have seen in our own lives.
I hate parents. I said it. I don't want to say it. At a high school level, especially in some communities, they use their kids athletic ability as currency to buy attention and admiration for their household. That kind of attitude cheapens kids and athletes out to play a simple game for fun. Sports are important to us... but they are not the end of the world.
Growing up, baseball was my sport. Basketball was okay, I could not play hockey, so nothing came close to baseball. My father loved baseball too and he was always supportive of things I participated in. Baseball was that great connector between my father and I where he would practice hours with me. He didn't do it out of hopes of getting a kid signed by a Major League team, but because I loved to play the game.
When I was in Little League, my team needed a coach. Parents noticed how my father always attended my games and was always there giving tips to kids on their mechanics (which they actually listened to). My father refused to be a head coach but rather an assistant coach. He did not want to deal with the responsibility of dealing with irate parents or playing politics. He coached because he loved me and the game.
I always remember what my dad did for my games. Playing at a private high school 45 minutes away from my home, my dad would drive an hour or more to catch my game. Then on the drive back we would talk. Not about what I did wrong and how I needed to make adjustments. No, never, it was always about what happened in the game and why did I do that. My father wanted to have me understand and strategize about the game, rather than tear down my playing. He knew that by high school, baseball was a sport I played in my spare time, to have fun.
When I was covering the Geneva Red Wings or covering the college teams, you see these kids who do love baseball. Though in reality they are working, its a job. Then they go out and play hard, pour their hearts into it. If they fail (something they cannot stand) they get a verbal lashing from parents. That's one thing I never saw or could imagine from my father.
It is clearly evident that I look up to my father. He taught me a lot of things; how to pitch, how to skate, change oil, roofing but most importantly how to be a real man and a real parent.
Sports are important... but they are not that important.
"Youth sports are not getting represented!"
"No one covers my kids games!"
"How come no one talks about youth hockey in Rochester!"
"GARBLE GARBLE GARBLE!"
Can I get a HAR-UMPH!
WHAM-TV sports anchor Mike Catalana neutralized the blaze of annoying calls by mentioning that local media only have enough time and resources to cover games. In fact due to our lack of top-tier major league team, we have a lot of high school and youth sports coverage.
Then like a wise sports writer he is, Scott Pitoniak laid out the wisdom. He pointed out that the problem lies in the parents. It could not have been spoken any better.
See the parents are the one's pushing for coverage. They push for the exclusives and the footage and the interviews. The athletes are out to play, especially in this market.
Let's be honest in Rochester, New York, there are very few, if any blue chip recruits who know the game of media and are playing it. That happens in LA, New York City or Chicago... not in market listed in the low 80's of over 180 markets.
The Roundtable of Flower City Journalism discussed the impact coaches have on young athletes and the parents damaging those coaches. Both writers of Sal's 401K have seen in our own lives.
I hate parents. I said it. I don't want to say it. At a high school level, especially in some communities, they use their kids athletic ability as currency to buy attention and admiration for their household. That kind of attitude cheapens kids and athletes out to play a simple game for fun. Sports are important to us... but they are not the end of the world.
Growing up, baseball was my sport. Basketball was okay, I could not play hockey, so nothing came close to baseball. My father loved baseball too and he was always supportive of things I participated in. Baseball was that great connector between my father and I where he would practice hours with me. He didn't do it out of hopes of getting a kid signed by a Major League team, but because I loved to play the game.
When I was in Little League, my team needed a coach. Parents noticed how my father always attended my games and was always there giving tips to kids on their mechanics (which they actually listened to). My father refused to be a head coach but rather an assistant coach. He did not want to deal with the responsibility of dealing with irate parents or playing politics. He coached because he loved me and the game.
I always remember what my dad did for my games. Playing at a private high school 45 minutes away from my home, my dad would drive an hour or more to catch my game. Then on the drive back we would talk. Not about what I did wrong and how I needed to make adjustments. No, never, it was always about what happened in the game and why did I do that. My father wanted to have me understand and strategize about the game, rather than tear down my playing. He knew that by high school, baseball was a sport I played in my spare time, to have fun.
When I was covering the Geneva Red Wings or covering the college teams, you see these kids who do love baseball. Though in reality they are working, its a job. Then they go out and play hard, pour their hearts into it. If they fail (something they cannot stand) they get a verbal lashing from parents. That's one thing I never saw or could imagine from my father.
It is clearly evident that I look up to my father. He taught me a lot of things; how to pitch, how to skate, change oil, roofing but most importantly how to be a real man and a real parent.
Sports are important... but they are not that important.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Solving the Hall of Fame Problem
Cooperstown, New York. The baseball Hall of Fame, the Mecca of the sport. The $27.5 Million dollar question: should steroid users be allowed past Saint Peter into baseball heaven.
Of course, St. Pete isn't a guy in a robe with a crown, he's a group of baseball writers who have no idea what to do about the Bondses, Clemenses and Palmieros of the world. Since I don't have a vote, I have some suggestions:
First, there are a few numbers (3000 hits, 200 wins, 500 home runs) that have, throughout history, guaranteed Hall of Fame bids, right? With the steroid era, Hall of Fame voters will just have to rethink the bar.
The new numbers should be 200, nine-and-three-eighths and three. A player should have less than 200 pounds of pure muscle, have a hat size under nine-and-three-eighths and shouldn't be able to pull any more than three airplanes with their teeth.
OK if not that, the Hall should consider building a new wing in Cooperstown. Maybe the one closest to a back alley and most shaped like a syringe.
Here's a blue print: As you walked in, there would be a statue of Bud Selig standing next to Big Mac and Sosa, all three with gleaming smiles and dollar-sign eyeballs. Behind glass and well lit are Barry Bonds before-and-after photos and before-and-after hats. The Hall won't be able to get a hold Bonds's 73rd or 756th home run balls because, well, upon landing, both baseballs exploded like water balloons. You see, cork and leather weaken when leaving and reentering the earth's atmosphere.
As you get to the plunger part of the syringe-shaped wing, Alex Rodriguez's note cards, Tic Tacs and a photo of him and Peter Gammons hugging. There next to it is the first base bag Palmerio stepped on after his 3000th hit. Well, whats left of it anyway.
Cooperstown can even hire Jose Canseco as a tour guide. Alright, maybe not. That should be Selig or Tom Hicks job, they'd know more.
Upon exiting the needle part of the steroid wing in Cooperstown, visitors will be able to enjoy the All-Anti-Steroid team. Some will, some won't get a statue in the actual Hall, but credit is due for out-performing the Supermen and doing it, as Bob Costas said, "all natural."
Catcher: Brad Ausmus - The only guy in the state of Texas who couldn't hit home runs. But you could always count on Ausmus to hold 'em at first, never allowing more than 10 passed balls or more than 50 stolen bases.
First Base: John Olerud - Wore the same size helmet in the field for 17 seasons. Olerud walked 259 more times than struck out and won three gold gloves.
Second Base: Craig Biggio - Holding my breath, crossing my fingers and knocking on wood here. It's hard to argue with over 3,000 hits, 414 stolen bases and eight seasons over 100 runs though.
Third Base: Scott Rolen - Had a swing and glove straight out of Hornsby's days. He hit between 21 and 34 home runs for nine straight seasons. Rolen also won seven gold gloves.
Shortstop: Omar Vizquel - I'm guessing the juice doesn't help with sacrifice bunts. Vizquel is the active leader with 239. In 2000, he made just three errors in 156 games.
Rightfield: Ichiro Suzuki - All-time single-season hits leader. Rookie of the Year. Most Valuable Player. Eight straight gold gloves and All-Star appearances. Five-foot-nine-inches, 160 pounds, enough said.
Centerfield: Kenny Lofton - The ultimate leadoff hitter. He is the active leader in stolen bases, including 75 in 1996. Lofton has four gold gloves, seven All-Star games and a .299 career batting average....and somehow, with 130 home runs, his name never appeared in a Canseco publication.
Leftfield: Garrett Anderson - Played over 100 games every season of his career. Had career highs of 201 hits, 56 doubles, 123 runs batted in and only struck out over 100 times once. If you want to be paranoid, Anderson had one season over 30 home runs....hopefully the ball was just hanging up in the smog that year.
Starting pitcher: Gred Maddux - It isn't easy to win four straight Cy Young awards throwing 85 miles per hour and looking more like a calculus professor than a pitcher, but Maddux did it.
Reliver: Mariano Rivera - A few blips (2001 World Series and 2004 ALCS) but he'll likely go down as the best closer ever, despite often being blown down by brisk winds.
Honorable mention: Bernie Williams, Placido Polanco, David Cone, Trevor Hoffman, David Eckstein, every backup catcher, pinch runner and knuckle-baller pitcher ever, Juan Pierre and Jamie Moyer.
Of course, St. Pete isn't a guy in a robe with a crown, he's a group of baseball writers who have no idea what to do about the Bondses, Clemenses and Palmieros of the world. Since I don't have a vote, I have some suggestions:
First, there are a few numbers (3000 hits, 200 wins, 500 home runs) that have, throughout history, guaranteed Hall of Fame bids, right? With the steroid era, Hall of Fame voters will just have to rethink the bar.
The new numbers should be 200, nine-and-three-eighths and three. A player should have less than 200 pounds of pure muscle, have a hat size under nine-and-three-eighths and shouldn't be able to pull any more than three airplanes with their teeth.
OK if not that, the Hall should consider building a new wing in Cooperstown. Maybe the one closest to a back alley and most shaped like a syringe.
Here's a blue print: As you walked in, there would be a statue of Bud Selig standing next to Big Mac and Sosa, all three with gleaming smiles and dollar-sign eyeballs. Behind glass and well lit are Barry Bonds before-and-after photos and before-and-after hats. The Hall won't be able to get a hold Bonds's 73rd or 756th home run balls because, well, upon landing, both baseballs exploded like water balloons. You see, cork and leather weaken when leaving and reentering the earth's atmosphere.
As you get to the plunger part of the syringe-shaped wing, Alex Rodriguez's note cards, Tic Tacs and a photo of him and Peter Gammons hugging. There next to it is the first base bag Palmerio stepped on after his 3000th hit. Well, whats left of it anyway.
Cooperstown can even hire Jose Canseco as a tour guide. Alright, maybe not. That should be Selig or Tom Hicks job, they'd know more.
Upon exiting the needle part of the steroid wing in Cooperstown, visitors will be able to enjoy the All-Anti-Steroid team. Some will, some won't get a statue in the actual Hall, but credit is due for out-performing the Supermen and doing it, as Bob Costas said, "all natural."
Catcher: Brad Ausmus - The only guy in the state of Texas who couldn't hit home runs. But you could always count on Ausmus to hold 'em at first, never allowing more than 10 passed balls or more than 50 stolen bases.
First Base: John Olerud - Wore the same size helmet in the field for 17 seasons. Olerud walked 259 more times than struck out and won three gold gloves.
Second Base: Craig Biggio - Holding my breath, crossing my fingers and knocking on wood here. It's hard to argue with over 3,000 hits, 414 stolen bases and eight seasons over 100 runs though.
Third Base: Scott Rolen - Had a swing and glove straight out of Hornsby's days. He hit between 21 and 34 home runs for nine straight seasons. Rolen also won seven gold gloves.
Shortstop: Omar Vizquel - I'm guessing the juice doesn't help with sacrifice bunts. Vizquel is the active leader with 239. In 2000, he made just three errors in 156 games.
Rightfield: Ichiro Suzuki - All-time single-season hits leader. Rookie of the Year. Most Valuable Player. Eight straight gold gloves and All-Star appearances. Five-foot-nine-inches, 160 pounds, enough said.
Centerfield: Kenny Lofton - The ultimate leadoff hitter. He is the active leader in stolen bases, including 75 in 1996. Lofton has four gold gloves, seven All-Star games and a .299 career batting average....and somehow, with 130 home runs, his name never appeared in a Canseco publication.
Leftfield: Garrett Anderson - Played over 100 games every season of his career. Had career highs of 201 hits, 56 doubles, 123 runs batted in and only struck out over 100 times once. If you want to be paranoid, Anderson had one season over 30 home runs....hopefully the ball was just hanging up in the smog that year.
Starting pitcher: Gred Maddux - It isn't easy to win four straight Cy Young awards throwing 85 miles per hour and looking more like a calculus professor than a pitcher, but Maddux did it.
Reliver: Mariano Rivera - A few blips (2001 World Series and 2004 ALCS) but he'll likely go down as the best closer ever, despite often being blown down by brisk winds.
Honorable mention: Bernie Williams, Placido Polanco, David Cone, Trevor Hoffman, David Eckstein, every backup catcher, pinch runner and knuckle-baller pitcher ever, Juan Pierre and Jamie Moyer.
The Anti-Steroid team will be there to remind us why we still watch. Because David Eckstein won World Series MVP, because Ichiro gunned Terrance Long at third and because no matter what steroid you use, Maddux's change was still unhittable.
The steroid wing will allow roiders to still be in the Hall of Fame so as not to be forgotten. It will give finality and closure for those of us who will always feel betrayed Major League Baseball.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Barkley's Apology
It's cheap entertainment. The never-ending supply of squirming superstars under the white hot light of scandal. Who hasn't chuckled at a millionaire athlete choking on arranged tears saying, "mistakes were made, I'm giving my life to God now."
In the downplay and dishonesty category, Mike Vick went with God. Alex Rodriguez and Michael Phelps played the, "I was young and stupid," card. Roger Clemens and Barry Bonds tried the "nuh uhh" approach.
But in the case of former Philadelphia 76ers and Phoenix Suns All-Star power forward Charles Barkley, something was different.
Barkley was arrested December 31, 2008, for driving under the influence. When Barkley was arrested, he was with a woman who was not his wife. He told the arresting officer he ran a stop sign because he was in a hurry to receive oral sex from the woman.
Barkley returned from leave last Thursday night to his anaylist position on TNT's "Inside the NBA." Former NBA players such as Karl Malone, Chris Webber and Gary Peyton unsuccessfully filled in during the absence.
No, "I'm sorry, but...." No note cards. No false tears.
In the downplay and dishonesty category, Mike Vick went with God. Alex Rodriguez and Michael Phelps played the, "I was young and stupid," card. Roger Clemens and Barry Bonds tried the "nuh uhh" approach.
But in the case of former Philadelphia 76ers and Phoenix Suns All-Star power forward Charles Barkley, something was different.
Barkley was arrested December 31, 2008, for driving under the influence. When Barkley was arrested, he was with a woman who was not his wife. He told the arresting officer he ran a stop sign because he was in a hurry to receive oral sex from the woman.
Barkley returned from leave last Thursday night to his anaylist position on TNT's "Inside the NBA." Former NBA players such as Karl Malone, Chris Webber and Gary Peyton unsuccessfully filled in during the absence.
Before Barkley spoke, I couldn't help but expect the usual. I expected 33 minutes of prepared lies sprinkled with insincerity and hidden smirks. I expected anything from a Spitzer subterfuge to a Palmiero point.
But Barkley looked into the camera and said, "I embarrassed everybody in my life. I'm sorry."No, "I'm sorry, but...." No note cards. No false tears.
I kept waiting for a bus load of excuses to arrive. You know the, "I didn't go to college," or, "I didn't know what I was putting in my body," type we've heard lately. But the bus never pulled in.
Barkley continued to speak, seemingly unrehearsed, and never once sounded as if he was blaming anyone but number one.
When host Ernie Johnson asked Barkley what he'd said to his daughter about the incident, Barkley gave an answer any shamed man would give. "I told her I really, really screwed up and that's all you can say. You can't make excuses, this was 100 percent my fault and it's unacceptable," he said.
I must give TNT credit for allowing Johnson to ask Barkley some tough, at-times awkward, questions. He asked about everything from Charles seeking professional help to what went through his mind as he saw the lights flashing.
The most amazing part: Johnsons concise interview included follow ups.
Maybe it's his natural charisma, the same that makes Sir Charles one of the most popular sports analysts, that makes him seem more believable than A-Rod or Phelps. But more than likely, its because he actually is sorry.
And that, is all we want.
We don't expect athletes to be saints when they grow up showered with praise, doused in money and put in sinful situations aplenty. But they must, upon miscue, understand that they are not beyond consequence. That their ability to hit home runs or catch touchdowns does not mean instant exoneration.
Barkley's apology may be the only one I can remember not thinking that he's only sorry because he got caught.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
A-Rod did steroids and Johnny Damon thinks it could have been worse.
The world of Major League Baseball is in shambles, proclaim the general media, because Alex Reodriguez used steroids. Somehow we were all transported into the world of 2003, where people were shocked that professional baseball players used enhancing drugs.
With A-Rod being the "latest and greatest to fall" (Sports Illustrated), the media believes we need every member of the New York Yankees to chime in. Derek Jeter spoke, as if the voice of God was coming down from heaven giving his opinion. Jeter, being the team captain and not trying to make clubhouse conflict, stated that the team was there to support Alex. Then Captain Derek tried to turn the attention away the Yankees.
Last night, Johnny Damon provided one of the best, unintentional humor, interviews of all time. When asked about his feelings towards A-Rod, Damon took a pro-team, pro-A-Rod stance. He then explained that there were other, more serious things Rodriguez could have done. This allowed a female reporter (they always seem to play a great set-up woman - see A.I.'s "practice" interview) to follow up asking, what things would he consider worse. Damon, straight faced, responds, he could have murdered someone. Thank you everyone and good night.
However, I'm still pretty sure Ray Lewis killed that dude in Atlanta.
With A-Rod being the "latest and greatest to fall" (Sports Illustrated), the media believes we need every member of the New York Yankees to chime in. Derek Jeter spoke, as if the voice of God was coming down from heaven giving his opinion. Jeter, being the team captain and not trying to make clubhouse conflict, stated that the team was there to support Alex. Then Captain Derek tried to turn the attention away the Yankees.
Last night, Johnny Damon provided one of the best, unintentional humor, interviews of all time. When asked about his feelings towards A-Rod, Damon took a pro-team, pro-A-Rod stance. He then explained that there were other, more serious things Rodriguez could have done. This allowed a female reporter (they always seem to play a great set-up woman - see A.I.'s "practice" interview) to follow up asking, what things would he consider worse. Damon, straight faced, responds, he could have murdered someone. Thank you everyone and good night.
However, I'm still pretty sure Ray Lewis killed that dude in Atlanta.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
RE:WHat?
Listen.
On behalf of those guys who write about their love for the rugged and never emotional or physically soft Sal Fasano, it was not my suggestion to mention such movie as Love Actually. That really happened. Granted this same ex-girlfriend was very open to watching games all the time... granted her taste in teams was questionable at times.
Though I am a big enough man so... I'm sorry. It won't happen again.
Oh and Love Actually is not endorsed and will never be endorsed by this website. Though if your like Clockwork Orange, you better watch 2001, that is some pretty deep stuff.
On behalf of those guys who write about their love for the rugged and never emotional or physically soft Sal Fasano, it was not my suggestion to mention such movie as Love Actually. That really happened. Granted this same ex-girlfriend was very open to watching games all the time... granted her taste in teams was questionable at times.
Though I am a big enough man so... I'm sorry. It won't happen again.
Oh and Love Actually is not endorsed and will never be endorsed by this website. Though if your like Clockwork Orange, you better watch 2001, that is some pretty deep stuff.
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